Marriage–Sometimes You Wade Through Sludge Together

The other day I spotted my husband Rick wearing chest-high weighters slogging his way through our koi pond. Middle of the summer-hot. Watching him wade in the gunk, I had the most peculiar thought.

You look sooooooo cute like that!

Which didn’t make sense. He was standing in a pile of goo.

I leaned over the deck. “What ‘cha doing?”

“Pump’s stopped up.”

“Doesn’t look like much fun.”

“Has to be done.”


I remembered times when our world seemed a lot like the nasty pond.


No way out.

Too messy to tackle.

Like when our infant son died minutes after he was born. Rick did what I couldn’t do. He disassembled the nursery before I got home from the hospital. (I wrote about it HERE.)

And when a precious family member spent some time walking a prodigal path, he said what I couldn’t say. “I’m sorry. We love you too much to help you,” he told her through his tears.

Nearly ripped my heart out, but he was right.

Then there was the time when another loved one (who is bipolar) went off his medication. Started doing meth. He was in bad shape. Rick convinced him to go to the hospital. Somehow got him in the truck. Drove him to the ER himself.

Maybe that’s why he looked so cute standing in the koi pond.

Wading through sludge, you discover what real love is made of.

Because when the water finally clears, something amazing happens.

You can see straight through to the bottom

And remember what you’ve been through together.

Some of you are wading through sludge right now. I’m praying for you.